이 책은 누구나 손쉽게 NLP 심리치료의 핵심 원리와 방법을 익힐 수 있도록 기술하였다. 시중에 NLP 관련 책들은 많이 있지만 너무 넓은 범위를 다뤄 독자들이 손쉽게 활용할 수 없거나 주로 이론적 내용을 담고 있는 책들이 많아 아쉬운 마음이었다. 따라서 필자는 독자들이 읽었을 때 덜 중요한 내용이거나 어려운 내용이라고 생각되는 부분은 과감히 생략하고, 누구나 이해하기 쉽게 풍부한 사례를 들어가며 핵심 위주로 기술하였다. 이 책을 통해 누구나 NLP의 작동 원리와 치료 원리에 대하여 기본을 이해할 수 있고, 여러 기법들을 실생활에서 쉽게 적용할 수 있을 것이다.
우울증이나 불안장애, 알레르기 반응, 기타 신체 부적응적 증상들은 사실 대부분 내가 의식하지 못하는 트라우마와 관련이 있는 경우가 많다. NLP의 우수성은 굳이 문제의 원인을 모르더라도 내 마음의 작용을 반대로 바꾸면 모든 심리적인 문제를 해결할 수 있다는 데에 있다. 그리고 대상이나 상황에 대한 내 마음의 고정관념을 반대로 바꾸는 것은 어렵지 않다. 그것은 상상을 통해 가능하다.
본 책의 특징 중 하나는 현대 물리학의 하나의 큰 기둥인 양자역학적 관점에서 NLP 치료 원리를 소개함으로써 NLP의 과학적 이해를 도우려고 한 점이다. 이 책을 통해 양자역학의 여러 원리들이 NLP 심리치료에 어떻게 적용되는지 알 수 있을 것이다.
양자역학에 의하면 집중력을 발휘하여 상상에 깊이 몰입할수록 상상을 실체화하는 것이 가능하다고 한다. NLP는 잠재의식이 활성화된 상태에서 구체적 상상을 통해 내가 바라는 변화, 심리상태를 이끌어 내기에 생각을 실체화한다는 양자역학의 원리와 일맥상통한다. 이러한 원리를 이용하면 평소에 건강한 정신생활을 위해서는 평소 부정적인 상념에 빠져들지 않고 그냥 흘려버리는 태도가 제일 중요하다는 결론이 나온다. 걱정이나 불안에 대해 자꾸 신경 쓰지 말고 얼른 잊어버리는 태도가 중요하다.
NLP의 치료 원리는 의외로 간단하다. NLP를 한마디로 정의한다면, ‘내가 상상하는 대로 그대로 이루어진다’는 것이다. 여기서의 상상은 오감을 동원한 실감나는 상상을 의미한다. 즉, 실재처럼 상상을 실감나게 한다면 그 상상이 현실로 그대로 이루어진다. 따라서 심신이 이완된 상태, 즉 편안한 상태에서 내가 바라는 상태를 구체적으로 상상하기만 하면 내가 원하는 정서 상태나 목표를 성취할 수 있게 된다. NLP는 쉽게 말해 심신이 이완된 상태에서 구체적 상상을 통해 마음의 변화를 이끌어내는 기술이다. 그리고 마음의 변화는 생각(의식)의 변화를 가져오고 생각의 변화는 행동의 변화를 가져온다.
NLP는 치료 성과와 효율 측면에서 볼 때 최고의 기법이다. 독자들은 이 책에 제시된 구체적 기법들과 사례들을 스스로 적용해 봄으로써 놀라운 마음의 변화를 경험할 수 있기를 바란다.
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머리말 / 3
제1장 NLP의 의미와 기본 원리 ···················································9
1. NLP의 기원 ···································································11
2. NLP의 의미 ···································································14
3. 의식과 무의식 또는 잠재의식 ················································15
4. NLP 기본 원리 - 리프레이밍(Reframing) ··································17
5. 리프레이밍을 위한 방법 ······················································21
6. NLP의 우수성 ································································25
제2장 이상심리의 원인에 대한 새로운 관점 ···································27
1. 새로운 관점의 도입 필요성 ··················································29
2. 영(靈)적 접근의 필요성 ······················································30
제3장 NLP와 양자역학 ······························································37
1. NLP의 양자역학적 이해 ······················································39
2. 생각과 언어의 힘의 양자역학적 해석 ·······································46
1) 위약 효과(placebo effect) ··············································48
2) 물의 결정체 변화 ·························································48
3) 말과 글씨의 힘으로 양파와 밥의 상태 변화 ···························50
4) 명상 만으로 전 세계 테러의 감소 ······································52
5) 타이타닉호의 침몰 ························································53
3. 양자역학적 관점에서 본 정신 증상의 발생 원인과 NLP 치료 원리 ······55
제4장 NLP의 작동 원리 ····························································59
1. 고전적 조건형성의 역조건화 ·················································61
2. 분리와 연합 ···································································63
3. 분아(分兒) 및 분아의 인격화 ················································66
4. 이중구속 상황 ·································································70
5. 최면치료와 NLP ······························································72
6. 밀턴 모델(에릭슨최면)과 NLP ···············································74
7. 메타 모델과 NLP ····························································101
제5장 NLP의 세계관 ·······························································107
1. 지도는 영토가 아니다. ······················································109
2. 모든 행동에는 긍정적 의도가 있다. ········································111
3. 무의식은 선의적이다. ·······················································112
4. 정신과 육체는 하나의 체계이다. ···········································115
5. 우리에겐 이미 치료에 필요한 모든 자원이 있다. ·························116
6. 변화를 원한다면 상위 단계의 의식부터 변화시켜라 - 뉴로로지컬 레벨 ···118
7. 메타 아웃컴과 목표 설정을 위한 8가지 질문 ·····························124
제6장 NLP 기초 개념 ······························································129
1. 표상체계와 하위감각양식 ···················································131
2. 선호표상체계 ·································································133
3. 앵커링 ········································································139
4. 시간선 및 시간선 치료 ······················································145
제7장 하위감각양식의 변화를 이용한 심리치료 ······························153
1. 간접적 방식을 이용한 하위감각양식의 변화 ·······························157
1) 공중분리기법 ····························································157
2) 미술관기법 ·······························································164
3) 주제음악기법 ····························································166
4) 영화관기법 ·······························································169
2. 직접적 방식을 통한 하위감각양식의 변화 ·································174
1) 확신하는 감정(신념)과 불확실한 감정에 대한 하위감각양식 확인 ··· 175
2) 부정적 신념을 변화시키는 방법 ········································178
3) 부정적 암시를 제거하는 방법 ··········································180
3. 스위시 기법을 이용한 하위감각양식의 변화 ·······························183
제8장 분아 통합 또는 분아와의 이별을 이용한 심리치료 ················191
1. 분아 통합(Parts Integration) ···············································203
2. 분아와의 이별 ·······························································210
1) 분아가 인격체의 모습을 갖추지 않고 덩어리의 모습으로 느껴지는 경우 ···························································212
2) 분아가 인격체의 모습으로 나타나는 경우 ·····························216
제9장 기타 NLP 기법을 이용한 심리치료 ····································227
1. 포지션 체인지 ·······························································229
2. 우수성의 원 ··································································235
3. 6단계 관점바꾸기 ····························································238
제10장 성공적 상담을 위한 조건 ·················································245
1. 상대방과 굳건한 라포가 형성되어야 한다. ································248
2. 심상화 능력 또는 주의집중력을 길러야 한다. ·····························256
3. NLP 치료 원리 및 작동 원리에 대한 충분한 이해와 믿음이 있어야 한다. ························································261
4. 치료적 저항을 극복하고 내담자 스스로 변화하고자 하는 의지가 있어야 한다. ························································263
부록 NLP와 같이 하면 좋은 기법: EFT ····································265
참고문헌 ·········································································275